Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
