Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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