It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
