playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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