apparently the secret to your success is patron
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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