Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
