HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
