just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
