i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
