Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
