Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
