It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
