And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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