and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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