just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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