Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
