Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
