just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
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