Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
