and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Randomize
