How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Randomize