But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
