hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I smell stomach acid.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
