know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Randomize