Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I just gift wrapped bread.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
