those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
