didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
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