how can u be prego again
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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