his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
