I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
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