i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
