I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
