Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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