HIV tests are more positive than that guy
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
