woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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