I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
