im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize