they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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