No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
We need to rekindle our bromance
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
