am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
