well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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