jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
