No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
high people should be assigned attendants
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Randomize
