He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Randomize
