Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
