I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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