I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
