I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
