Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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