I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
