i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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