I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Randomize
