ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I love you.
Bad choice
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize